Although I feel like I’ve been monstrously busy, you’d be surprised how little I am actually getting done.
Having my son home has really put a freeze on my productivity, especially when it is so nice outside. You will often find us at the park, or the library, or having a picnic at the beach. My boy is a very busy kid, and any way I can get him off of Minecraft I jump at.
These days do have me wondering how I used to do this all day every day. Before he was in school, and even his first two years of kindergarten in the midst of the global pandemic with at home learning. How did I fill the days and get anything done is a feat I can barely remember.
Specifically, 2019, when I had the emotional turmoil of my crumbled marriage swirling around me. I sometimes have flashes of those days flit through my brain. How I felt like my whole world had shattered and I had to keep it together enough to get my very little boy and I through the days.
I remember just hiding in the shower, not really washing, trying to mask the tears with the water for the fifteen minutes I could steal away for myself. I remember telling myself over and over, ‘just make it to September, then he’ll be in school and you can let your impending breakdown take over’.
Now that we’ve come out the other side; I am healed, stable and living my best life with my son, I can really see how strong I must have been.
Even in 2021, when my boy was on summer vacation and I was in college. I would have my class on in an earbud while I made breakfast and did dishes. I’d take my textbooks absolutely everywhere and read through my homework while he played at the park or long after he had fallen asleep.
This year, I am budding into my new career and am just barely starting. However, I haven’t been able to dedicate as much time to my work as I’d like. Even my writing has slowed this month as I am on full time summer mom mode.
I do like to keep him busy as much as I can, so I excitedly get him into amazing day camps and community activities; but then I have to fill in the logistics of getting to all of them and organizing the day around them. And my kid can be such a sourpuss when he is tired.
But I do it all, because I absolutely adore him. I give everything I have because that’s what mom’s do. We even scootered down to the beach in the pouring rain at the start of the month for his baseball awards.
Being a mom takes everything you’ve got and the some; summer is a good testament to that notion. But at the end of the day, even if I got none of my work done and my house is a disaster, I still soak up every fun filled, fast paced summer day I get to spend with him. Every pizza and movie night, unplanned splash park visit, extra five chapters of our book before bed, or the newest wildflower find.
I hope your summer has been as sweet as ours!
